February 16, 2017

Having Trouble? Form a Heart Circle

If you are like most modern women and find yourself stretched too thin it can sometimes be difficult to gain forward momentum. In a multitasking world the plates keep spinning but dreams and long-term goals sometimes get lost in the frenzy. If this scenario sounds familiar you may want to consider forming a Heart Circle.

heart handsHeart Circles go by many names but the major gist is that you get a small group of trusted friends together specifically to work on turning dreams into reality. Unlike a heart-to-heart meets a barn raising you as individuals will be doing most of the work but together you are able to offer each other both support and outside perspective for some of the goals that keep eluding you. Also note that a Heart Circle is not a happy hour or a gabfest, so save the cocktails for another occasion because a Heart Circle requires your full attention.

Here’s how it works…

Dream Without Recrimination

A Heart Circle should be a small group (maybe 4 people max) and one of the places in your life where you can truly say what it is you want, no matter how crazy it may sound. So when choosing friends to participate you need non-judging friends and you also need trusted friends because what you say should be considered “sacred space” and should never leave the circle without specific permission by you. As for no judgment it’s imperative to be able to dream of a better future and to be able to voice those dreams before you can ever really hope to do something about bringing them about, so again, choose the right people.


Introduce Dreams to Reality

Have trouble dreaming? Then grab a stack of magazines and start tearing our images that align with what you want out of life, from a new puppy to a beautiful house. Once you’ve got all the images that express your desires either tape them in a notebook or make a big vision board that you can refer to every day.

It’s also helpful to write a list of everything you want out of life but to write it in the present tense such as “I’m so happy that I’m fit and healthy and in a happy and loving relationship…” Yes this may sound cheesy but words have power and the “I can’ts” are incredibly damaging to your potential so even if it’s pretending write out your hopes in present and refer to them every morning and every night.


Set Goals

The the work begins as you and your circle come up with some viable solutions to each issue. Some may be as simple as “Oh I know a great mechanic!” to offering suggestions for a yoga class or to be your walking buddy. Of course not every quandary will have an instant solution but now you have 3 other people who have your back and want you to succeed. Then hold each other accountable. Did you have the goal of walking 4 times this week? If so your Heart Circle will check with you and ask about it the following week. So it seems like a good idea to get those walking shoes on, doesn’t it?


Acknowledge Successes

Notice how when someone loses five pounds they say “I only lost 5 pounds”? Yet if they gain 5 pounds it’s the end of the world. It is all too easy for us to play up our near misses and to downplay our successes. In a Heart Circle be sure to acknowledge the achievements no matter how small because baby steps lead to walking and then running before you know it.

And even though it’s more effective to have a Heart Circle once a week and face-to-face you can still make this kind of commitment with friends across the globe. It’s about intention, effort, and support in a space that’s existence is solely to help you better your life.

This Post is Written by Emily Rankin.  She also writes for www.carinsurance.org.uk

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